Should hall passes exist in relationships? | OliveCoco Magazine

Monday, Mar 19th, 2012

A few months ago, I had the opportunity to watch the movie ?Hall Pass?.? This movie is a must see: It?s extremely funny but it also allows for some good conversation within your relationship. So, take a second and ask yourself, ?Should a hall pass exist in my relationship??

Let?s get into the reasons a hall pass could possibly exist. Hall passes are thought of often times when a relationship is encountering some sort of adversity or when there are thoughts of taking the relationship to the ultimate level (Marriage). Now notice I didn?t reference a hall pass within a marriage. This is because my beliefs on marriage are strict. When I say strict, I mean no intimate relationship outside of the marriage whatsoever, but that?s neither here nor there. Another reason why a hall pass may be considered is to spice up the relationship.

Hall passes are extremely dangerous in a relationship and almost 100% of the time the woman has to suggest it even though it is always at the back of the guy?s head.? MEN, trust and believe if you suggest it, you are in for a world of hurt. Now let?s get to the ?Nitty-Gritty?! As I?ve stated, hall passes are considered when a relationship encounters some sort of adversity. Adversity can consist of many things such as smothering, dwindling excitement, and just thoughts of life outside of the relationship.

Smothering ends lots of relationships because it stunts personal growth, which in turn complicates the growth of the couple. When this occurs, the two parties begin to do radical things that hurt the relationship even more until they come across the idea of a hall pass.? When one of the parties feels smothered and a hall pass comes into the equation, they approach it as a way of providing a sense of fresh air. Is this okay? While this helps some couples, others aren?t so lucky. Let?s just say fresh air doesn?t remain fresh for long; in fact, it gets polluted extremely fast. Maturity is a must in this case. So, is it impossible? No, but it can damage the dynamic of some relationship.

When the excitement has reached its peak in a relationship, couples run to Hall Passes as a form of excitement. Honestly, if you have sex with another person for a night and your partner knows, do you truly think the excitement will return? Everything will feel great while you?re with the outside party, but when you return home, the relationship remains stale. What I am saying is this: Make a valiant attempt to stimulate your relationship before you consider a hall pass. You just may find out that the issue resides a little deeper than just excitement.

When a hall pass is considered due to a reason such as thoughts of life outside the relationship, then you just have to ask yourself is a relationship truly what you want. SIMPLE AS PUT!

Here?s where I am in understanding of the Hall Pass concept. A lot of couples try this Hall Pass thing out when the next step in the relationship is marriage. The Hall Pass is considered at this point because marriage is a lifetime deal and both parties would like to be sure that nothing else is out there. This is risky but discussed in depth once it is considered. Often times, one?or maybe both?parties haven?t experienced life to the fullest and feel if ?they haven?t gone through something? it could hurt the foundation of their relationship. The reason a hall pass is considered before marriage in most cases is because both parties want to make sure the opposite party has gotten everything out of their system before marriage: The greatest form of commitment in a relationship. I am a guy, so there is some sort of curiosity there. I think every male has said to himself, ?Hmmmm I wonder if my woman would allow me to see what else is out there before I popped the question??

Taking a more logical look at this, I do believe some couples need this to grow.? There are some cases where the man or woman have only been with one or two women/men, got married right away, and later on down the line they?ve gotten that itch. So, I truly understand. When the hall pass is abused just because one of you wants to have sex one last time before you get married, I stand firm when saying I don?t agree.

So, this question stands: Would you consider a Hall Pass in your relationship?

POSTED BY: anthonydavis

Source: http://www.olivecocomag.com/should-hall-passes-exist-in-relationships/

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